Old guy tells me to pick up shit

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Old guy tells me to pick up shit

Post  Gothboy77 on Tue Nov 26, 2013 5:56 pm

So here's the scenerio: My gf and I decide to go out back of my building to take the dog out and smoke a cig. so we are chatting waiting
for the dog to go potty in 30 degree weather. We're chillin, waitin, then, ALL OF THE SUDDEN this old fart comes walking past through
the alley, walking his own dog. I figure no big deal then my gf wispers to me "that old guy is looking at us" so I non-nonchalantly gaze over


He says: "Is that your dog?"
Im thinking: ("No shit dumbass im only standing here watching it pop a squat for no reason")

I'm like "Yeah this is my dog"

He says: "Your supposed to clean up it's shit"
wait, WHAT?

Me: "What?"
Old Man: "Where do you live?"
(Now this one was obvious I'm not sure how stupid this old guy really is)

Me: "Uh, right here at this building"
Old Man: "Your supposed to clean up the dog shit. You need to carry a bag around and pick it up"
(fucking, really? THIS IS MY OWN PROPERTY YOU WRINKLY DOUCHE)

Me: "Oh. Do you have a bag?"
Old Man: "No I don't need one, my dog went earlier"
(oh, so I guess old people are excluded from picking up dog shit. must be extra cool. Also, just because it went earlier doesn't mean it might not have to go again. WHERE ARE YOUR BAGS YOU HYPOCRITICAL FUCK)

Me: "Ok sir, thanks for your concern"
Old Man: "If you don't get it picked up I am going up to the town hall and filing a complaint"
(OK NOW IM FUCKING PISSED. THERE ARE LIKE 4 SMALL PILES OF DOG SHIT ON MY OWN DAMN PROPERTY)

Then he left. My girlfriend and I were both stunned by the sheer stupidity and rudeness of this old fellow. How are you supposed to respect your elders when they act like inconsiderate asshats? Was he going around checking out peoples yards and making sure they didn't have dog shit in them? IS HE SOME KIND OF SHIT INSPECTOR? Why did he target me? Why doesn't he go around to random houses and make comments on how much dog shit they have in their yards? A lot of people in this town have dogs, and I am pretty sure they have dog shit in their yard somewhere, to a much more elevated degree than my own.

Long story short I picked up the dog shit, but damn was that old guy a fuckin douche. Just though I'd rant about that.

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Yes please.

Post  General_Creed on Mon Jun 15, 2015 6:37 pm

I feel the man should be held in the utmost respects, only if he had, Glorious White Facial Hair, that is. Cause that makes any man instantly respectable.

And any woman with it, equally respectable. After all, any woman brave enough to grown one is worthy of such.

Also i add to this rant in a completely unrelated manner, I see no old man emoji, or one with facial hair at all. This is a violation of my rights as an old man.
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